[EVA]Yui Ikari Is A Bitch

[Ray Miller]

I've had the impression that she was aware of what would be happening in
the near future (Seele's plans for the Third Impact, etc) - perhaps more
than Gendo was - and sacrificed her ability to be an active part of her
family's lives for a chance to turn events in a possible better
direction.

I think she was aware of the unavoidable heartache she'd cause her son
and husband, and tried to be there for Shinji in some capacity given her
newfound circumstances, and for him when it was time for him to make
that final critical decision.

Gendo becoming an obsessive, heartless bastard was his own choice,
however.  As an adult, he certainly could have made more humane
decisions with regard to his relationship with his son and 'daughter'. 
There are plenty of other parents who have lost their spouses who choose
to continue to support their children rather than send them packing or
use them as a replacement.

- Ray